It wasn't your typical bachelor pad! It was a true mansion sitting large and proud on a hill like a robust rooster demanding attention perched in Paradise Valley Arizona. Tyler and I danced through the triple-wide hallways, our bare feet slapping the travertine tile as we laughed and played and made our way to the kitchen for water. We had been up for two days and two nights and the new morning for what would be the third day wasn't pressing us to sleep. We were having so much fun eating ecstasy pills (something I was new to, and gave little concern of the risks since it felt so blissful). In the kitchen Tyler and I guzzled water, but we both could barely keep from smiling. Water dribbled down both our chins. I loved his cute face, he was younger than me, his skin was flawless, his smile big and kinda square and his big brown and gold eyes active and bright... "Baby I just want to make you pregnant" he said. I was shocked! No one had ever said that to me before. Although I was not ready to be a mother nor would I ever allow myself to get pregnant during this party stage in my life, I was flattered and felt loved by Tyler. He wasn't just saying he wanted a child, he was saying he wanted me always in his life.
After hydrating ourselves Tyler gave me my own personal concert while he mixed electronic music on his CDJ's (which were like turntables but allowed a DJ to mix his CD's rather than his records). Tyler's DJ name was DJ Tempting Business; I called him Tempting B and he loved it and he loved me, he adored me, I could see it in his eyes. Tyler was my first boyfriend who was also my friend, my buddy as well as my lover. I danced to his music before him, I felt beautiful, he felt talented, life felt good.
(I will touch further on this 3 year long Chemical relationship)
I remember this, living on the edge without a care in the world, where it seems you are the only two that exsist and happiness is a neverending waterfall. Drugs, party life, money, nice hotels and restaurants and swirling around you and you eventually forget who you are. When is it time to grow up and out of that stage and realize that your living in a fantasy.You realize that this is not the life you want for yourself; your future family. You have to take time to rediscover the real you and be strong enough to pull yourself out of the fire. And if the man really loves you then he will follow, remember forever is a long time we must be careful who will be by our side
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